First Date Questions
Anything but "so, what do you do?"
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 20–60 min
- Cost
- Free · no signup
- Long distance
- Works long distance
Ready?
Anything but "so, what do you do?"
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 20–60 min
- Intensity
- Sweet
Free · No signup · Nothing you answer is saved
How do you play First Date Questions?
Good first date questions produce stories rather than facts — "What is something you are unreasonably good at?" tells you more about someone than their job title. Use two or three when the conversation dips rather than working through a list, and answer everything you ask. Avoid asking about exes.
How to play
- This is not a deck to work through. Use it when the conversation dips.
- Ask one, answer it yourself too, then let it go wherever it goes.
- Follow the story rather than returning to the list.
- Do not read them off a phone at the table if you can remember two.
- Three or four in an evening is plenty.
Why couples love this game
A first date is really a test of whether the conversation is any good, and the standard questions guarantee it will not be. Swapping two of them for something specific changes the entire evening — and the answers are far more revealing than the facts you were going to collect anyway.
The standard first date runs an interview: job, hometown, siblings, holidays. It is a perfectly efficient way to gather facts and a terrible way to find out whether you like someone.
These questions do the other thing. They are easy to answer, they produce stories rather than data, and they tell you far more about how someone thinks than their job title ever will.
None of them are heavy. It is a first date, not an assessment — the aim is a good hour, and the good hour is the information.
Example questions
- What is something you are unreasonably good at?
- What did you get properly obsessed with recently?
- What is the best thing that has happened to you this year?
- What is a strong opinion you hold about something completely trivial?
- What would you do with a year off and no money worries?
- What is the last thing that made you laugh out loud on your own?
The full game has 22 of these, shuffled every time you play.
Who this game is best for
- A genuine first date
- Dating app conversations before you meet
- Anyone who freezes on what to ask next
- Video dates
Tips to make it better
- Answer everything you ask. Nobody enjoys being the only one talking.
- Do not ask about exes. It is the one topic that reliably ends the good version of the evening.
- Two good questions beat twelve. Let the conversation win.
- Second Date Questions is the deck for when it goes well.
Frequently asked questions
What should you ask on a first date?
Anything that gets a story instead of a fact. Job, hometown and siblings are efficient and forgettable; what someone got obsessed with recently tells you how they think.
What should you not ask on a first date?
Exes, salary, and anything about where this is going. All three turn a nice evening into a negotiation, and none of them give you information you need on day one.
Is it weird to use a question list on a date?
Reading a phone at the table is. Remembering two of these beforehand is not — that is just having thought about it.