Questions to Ask Your Fiancé
Before the wedding takes over everything.
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 30–50 min
- Cost
- Free · no signup
- Long distance
- Works long distance
Ready?
Before the wedding takes over everything.
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 30–50 min
- Intensity
- Sweet
Free · No signup · Nothing you answer is saved
How do you play Questions to Ask Your Fiancé?
Questions to ask your fiancé should be about the marriage rather than the wedding — what each of you thinks you are promising, what you expect when things get hard, and how you will handle money and conflict. Do it away from wedding planning, and treat any disagreement as information rather than a warning sign.
How to play
- Do this away from anything wedding-related. No lists in the room.
- Both answer every question fully.
- Where you differ, note it and keep going. Do not solve it tonight.
- Come back to the two biggest differences on another evening.
- Eight to ten is a session.
Why couples love this game
It gets the marriage conversation in before the wedding eats the calendar. Couples who do this consistently report that the day itself felt lighter afterwards, because the important conversation had already happened and the seating chart went back to being a seating chart.
The engaged year has a trap in it. There is a wedding to plan, and planning is urgent and endless, so almost all of the available conversation goes to venues and lists — and the thing the wedding is for gets discussed less than the seating chart.
This deck is about the marriage rather than the day. It asks what you each think you are promising, what you are quietly nervous about, and what you expect the other to do when things get hard.
None of it requires you to have answers already. Finding out where you differ is worth more now than it will ever be again.
Example questions
- What do you think you are actually promising?
- What are you quietly nervous about?
- What does being married mean to you that being together does not?
- What do you expect me to do when things get hard?
- What did you learn about marriage from watching your parents?
- What is something you want to leave behind from your family?
The full game has 22 of these, shuffled every time you play.
Who this game is best for
- The engaged year, ideally early in it
- Anyone deep in wedding planning who has stopped talking about the marriage
- Couples doing premarital counselling alongside it
- Long-distance engagements
Tips to make it better
- No wedding admin in the same conversation. It will win.
- Difference is information, not a warning sign. Note it and move on.
- Write down anything you genuinely agree on. You will both remember it differently.
- The children question deserves its own evening if it produces a gap.
Frequently asked questions
What should engaged couples talk about before the wedding?
Money, conflict, children, and expectations of each other under stress. Those four cause most of the genuinely hard conversations later, and the engaged year is the cheapest time to have them.
What if we disagree on something big?
Better now than in year three. Note it, finish the deck, and come back to it on a separate evening when you are not also answering twenty other questions.
Is this the same as premarital counselling?
No. This is a conversation deck, not therapy. It pairs well with counselling and is not a substitute for it.