Rate Our Relationship
Score it out of ten. Then compare.
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 20–35 min
- Cost
- Free · no signup
- Long distance
- Works long distance
Ready?
Score it out of ten. Then compare.
- Players
- 2 players
- Length
- 20–35 min
- Intensity
- Sweet
Free · No signup · Nothing you answer is saved
How do you play Rate Our Relationship?
Rate Our Relationship has both partners score the same fourteen areas out of ten independently — communication, affection, money, arguments, quality time — then reveal together. The individual scores matter less than the gaps, and couples are advised to discuss only the largest one per session.
How to play
- Score each area out of ten independently. Do not discuss while you score.
- Do not look at each other's screens. This matters.
- Reveal all scores at once at the end.
- Ignore the areas where you match. Go straight to the gaps.
- Pick the single largest gap and talk about that one properly.
Why couples love this game
A gap is much easier to discuss than a complaint. "I think our communication is a four and you think it is an eight" is a neutral, factual opening that leads somewhere; "you never listen to me" does not. The numbers give you a way in that nobody has to defend.
You both score the same areas out of ten — communication, affection, how you handle money, how you argue — without seeing each other's answers. Then you compare.
The individual scores are almost meaningless. What matters is the gap: an area where one of you says eight and the other says four is the single most useful piece of information a relationship game can produce.
It is honest and slightly exposing, so play it when things are basically fine. This is a tune-up, not a repair.
Example things you rate
- How well we communicate day to day
- How well we communicate when something is wrong
- How affectionate we are
- Our physical relationship
- How we handle money
- How we handle disagreements
The full game has 14 of these, shuffled every time you play.
Who this game is best for
- Couples who want a structured check-in with data
- Once or twice a year, not monthly
- Long-term and married couples
- Video calls
Tips to make it better
- Score honestly. A card of nines is a wasted evening.
- Do not react while your partner is scoring. Wait for the reveal.
- One gap per session. Trying to fix four things at once fixes none.
- Do this when things are good. It is a tune-up, not an intervention.
- Redo it in six months and compare.
Frequently asked questions
What should couples rate?
Areas specific enough to act on. "Communication when something is wrong" is useful; "happiness" is not, because nobody knows what to do with a low score on it.
What if our scores are really different?
That is the outcome the game is for. A gap is a much easier conversation than a complaint, because neither of you has to defend a number.
How often should we do this?
Once or twice a year. Monthly turns it into surveillance. Relationship Check-In is the better monthly habit.